Seeking Father

Abstract

Tension plagues the relationship between the author and his father when it comes to golf- and gay-related issues. The author is also stuck between two canonical stories, one that says he must work things out to fulfill his responsibilities as a son and another that tells him to let go, to realize that he “can’t choose his relatives,” and to view the relationship as a waste of time. In this project, the author uses a relational paradigm to reframe the father-son relationship in which he finds himself immersed. He’s a victim, so is his father. He’s an oppressor, so is his father. They victimize and oppress together, simultaneously hurting and being hurt while never deciding to quit. The story is about the troubled relationship that separates them. It’s a story of sexuality and sport, of gayness and hegemonic masculinity, of a fag and his golf clubs. It’s a story of love and hate.