Grief as a normative phenomenon: The diffuse and ambivalent normativity of infant loss and parental grieving in contemporary Western culture

Abstract

Grief is often conceived in causal or reactive terms, as something that simply strikes people after a loss. But, on closer scrutiny, there are good reasons to think of grief as a normative phenomenon, which is done or enacted by people, relative to cultural norms. To substantiate the claim that grief should be thought of as normative, we draw upon empirical examples from a qualitative interview study with bereaved parents following infant loss, and analyze how grieving the loss of a small child in our culture is experienced, interpreted, and enacted within a diffuse and ambivalent, yet inescapable, moral framework. Further, we discuss some of the possible consequences for bereaved individuals when navigating the normative landscape of grieving in contemporary Western cultures: A landscape in which suffering is increasingly dealt with in psychiatric and medical terms and understood as an adverse and unnecessary condition to be overcome in order to maximize personal health, happiness, and well-being.