A Canadian story of Jewish divorce: listening to rabbis across denominations wrestle with egalitarianism and K’lal Yisrael

Abstract

This ethnographic interview-based research (2016–2021) analyzes the narratives of a cohort of rabbis in Ottawa who share their experiences of Jewish divorce. Jewish religious divorce is gendered and asymmetrical where the husband gives the divorce to the passively receiving wife who may not herself initiate divorce. This project interrupts the ways in which Jewish divorce is primarily identified in terms of get abuse in the Orthodox world. The asymmetrical divorce process contributes to get abuse, which includes delaying, refusing, or extorting favourable terms in exchange for the husband providing the wife with her get (religious divorce). Women who cannot secure divorces are known as agunot (singular agunah, chained women), who cannot remarry and who commit adultery if they have sexual relations with another man. Women face the additional burden that if they bear children to anyone other than their husband, such children would have the status of mamzerim (singular mamzer, legally illegitimate, product of an illicit union) who may not marry other Jews except other mamzerim, who may not hold certain positions of communal leadership, and whose status is inherited from generation to generation. This gendered injustice becomes the focus of scholarship even as it arouses both communal activism and internal debates. While get abuse is most common in the Orthodox Jewish community, our interviews with Canadian rabbis reveals that Jewish divorce is a transdenominational phenomenon that plays out within and across denominational boundaries. Against a backdrop of increasing stringency in the Orthodox world transnationally, and intensifying concern for the consequences of inegalitarian Jewish divorce, rabbinic stories point to shifting denominational practice. This transdenominational context is key to understanding Jewish divorce in North America. Attending to Jewish divorce in Canada through a denominational lens does important work in disentangling systemic and local factors. We argue that rabbinic stories about how rabbis engage with divorce reveals how the twin challenges of egalitarianism and rabbinic concerns for the unity and continuity of the Jewish people ( K’lal Yisrael) shape the experience of Jewish divorce and divorce practice itself. Jewish divorce impacts women in particularly gendered ways but is largely interpreted and practiced by male rabbis. Through our original theoretical framework of “troubling orthopraxy”, we analyse how orthopraxy (correct divorce practice) is conflated with stringency, and how that dynamic pushes and pulls at divorce practice.