The Long-Term Effects of Grief on Marital Intimacy following an Infant's Death

Abstract

This follow-up study examined how marital intimacy changes over time in bereaved couples and how their marriages are affected by the death of their infant. A group of thirty-one bereaved couples who two to four years earlier had lost an infant (> 20 weeks gestation and < 1 year of age) were revisited in their home twenty-four months after the initial home visit. Couples did report a significant drop in sexual intimacy at follow-up compared to before the loss and at the initial home visit. Moreover, wives reported less emotional intimacy overall, than did their husbands. In contrast to wives whose own initial grief responses predicted their feelings about their marriages two years later, intensity of husband's initial grief response did not affect their relationship with their wives but, rather a more powerful predictor was their wives' initial reactions, the early state of their marriage (whether they had considered separating), and whether or not they had warning of the impending death. Finally, there is some evidence that women are affected in part, by their husbands' grief.