Can you keep a secret? Family histories, secrets and ethics

Abstract

Secrets are important for understanding interpersonal and family relationships. They give insights into the dynamics, processes, interactions and bonds that are developed, interrupted or revisited throughout life. We address family secrets as observatories of interpersonal relationships in two ways. One relates to how the disclosed secrets reveal social norms and social changes in family relationships. The second relates to telling an individual or family secret during a research interaction and what ethical issues and practices this disclosure implied. We address these issues through the secrets that emerged from 49 interviews carried out within a family histories research project with 15 Portuguese families. We identified a variety of family secrets related in particular to family and reproduction, money and addiction. The emergence of secrets in the interviewees’ narratives reveals the fundamental role of secrets in attributing meanings to biographies and family histories.