‘Why would I want sex now?’ A qualitative study on older women's affirmative narratives on sexual inactivity in later life

Abstract

Abstract The existing research tries to understand the reasons for discontinuing sex in later life with the assumption that people want to be sexual. Although the growing body of literature informs that sex remains an integral part of older adults’ lives, a substantial number of older adults declare not being sexually active. This study aimed at exploring motives for deliberately choosing sexual inactivity among older women. Semi-structured interviews with 16 Polish women (aged 65–82) were thematically analysed in relation to the sexual scripts theory and the participants’ specific socio-cultural background. Three main themes regarding the reasons for cessation of their sex life were identified: ‘I am glad that sex does not concern me anymore’, ‘I am satisfied with my memories’ and ‘The right one’ or no one. The results indicate that some women give up sex for good, with no regrets or feeling of a loss; for others, it may be a temporary decision, its duration dependent on meeting the right partner. Developing sexual agency may encourage discontinuing their sex life – a choice perceived as optimal and liberating. Personal factors and the memories of marital relationships seem to shape older women's (a)sexual expectations. Acknowledging these nuances may contribute to a better understanding of older women's sexual functioning; implications for consideration in further research and practice are also discussed.